7 Fresh AF Holiday Recipes Using Dove Soap

7 Fresh AF Holiday Recipes Using Dove Soap

Too many people ignore the nutritional value and intensely satisfying flavor of Dove Soap and its many varieties. And because we have to, we whipped up some delicious holiday recipes for you to try this season in hopes that we can keep this sponsorship.

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1.) Doodles N' Dove

snickerdoodles


We know you love your cookies, and we know you like them clean.  For the absolute cleanest snickerdoodles, use Dove. Substitute those boring eggs with two delicious bars of Dove Fresh Moisture soap. Rip open the front gates to a brand new world of fresh flavor!

Ingredients

1 1/2 cups sugar
1/2 cup butter
1/2 cup shortening
2 bars of Dove Fresh Moisture Soap
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour 
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup sugar
2 teaspoons ground cinnamon 

Directions

  1. Ask someone to heat the oven to 400ºF.
  2. Mix 1 1/2 cups sugar, the butter, shortening, and Dove soap in large bowl. Stir in flour, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt, and whatever the fuck else.
  3. Shape dough into 1 1/4-inch balls. Mix 1/4 cup sugar and the cinnamon. Place 2 inches apart on ungreased cookie sheet.
  4. Bake 8 to 10 minutes. Remove from cookie sheet, and immediately put them directly into your mouth.

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2.) Holiday Ham & Dove Soap Casserole

ham and dove casserole

Ham, Cheese, and Dove Soap. The classic threesome.

Ingredients:

1 cup diced ham
1 cup diced red peppers
1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley
1/2 cup minced onions
1 loaf sourdough bread
3 cups cheese shredded
12 eggs
1 cup Dove hand soap
1 cup heavy whipping cream
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground pepper


Directions:

  1. In a large bowl, mix the eggs, Dove soap, cream, salt, pepper, nutmeg and cayenne. Dump it all haphazardly on top of the other ingredients.
  2. Cover and refrigerate overnight or until you can't fucking handle it anymore.
  3. Remove from the refrigerator before preheating the oven to 350.  Bake uncovered for about 45 minutes. Then add a Dove hand soap drizzle for a little extra kick! 
  4. Enjoy!

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3.) Dove Shea Butter Gingerbread Cookies

gingerbread
"Another goddamn recipe for cookies," you ask? Of course! It's Christmas, and as we all know, there are never enough cookie recipes or places for us to toss in a good word for our sponsor, Dove soap.

Ingredients:

3 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
3/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon pepper
8 tablespoons unsalted Dove Purely Pampering Shea Butter
1/4 cup vegetable shortening
1/2 cup packed light brown sugar
2/3 cup unsulfured molasses
1 large egg

Directions:

  1. Sift the flour, baking soda, cinnamon, ginger, allspice, cloves, salt and pepper through a wire sieve into a medium bowl or whatever you have left that isn't dirty.
  2. In a large bowl, using a hand-held electric mixer at high speed, beat the Dove Purely Pampering Shea Butter and vegetable shortening until well-combined. Refrigerate until chilled.
  3. Remove the dough from the refrigerator and let stand at room temperature. Don't let your grubby son put his disgusting hands all over it.
  4. Roll out the dough 1/8 inch thick. For softer cookies, roll out slightly thicker, and use a fuckload more Dove Purely Pampering Shea Butter. Using cookie cutters, cut out the cookies and transfer to nonstick cookie sheets.
  5. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes. Cool on the sheets for 2 minutes, then transfer to wire cake racks to cool completely. Decorate obscenely with Dove Fine Silk Beauty Cream Wash. 

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4.) Sweet and Spicy Dove Cream Oil Yams

I Yam What I Yam, And I Yam in Love with Dove.

Ingredients

medium yams, peeled and sliced
1/2 teaspoon orange peel
1/2 cup orange juice
1 tablespoon brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt 
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon allspice
1/2 cup Dove Cream Oil

1 can Popeye's spinach 

Directions

  1. In a large skillet, bring 1 cup of water to a boil while you hate-watch "The Princess Switch" starring Vanessa Hudgens on Netflix.
  2. Add yams.
  3. Cover and simmer for 15 minutes or until you're bored.
  4. Drain.
  5. In a small bowl, mix orange peel, orange juice, brown sugar, salt, cinnamon, Popeye's spinach, and allspice.
  6. Pour over yams in skillet.
  7. Cook and stir until bubbly or until you start to get worried that you might fuck it up.
  8. Simmer, uncovered, for 5 minutes, spooning the scrumptious Dove Cream Oil over potatoes to make a glaze.

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5.) Easy Fresh Burst Peach Cobbler

"Is that whipped cream?"
"No way, that's Dove!"

Ingredients

1/2 cup butter, melted
1 cup all-purpose flour
2 cups sugar
3 teaspoons baking powder
1 bar Dove go Fresh Burst Beauty Bar
1 cup milk
4 cups peeled, pitted, and thinly sliced fresh peaches
Several dashes of ground cinnamon and nutmeg

Directions

  1. Make your spouse preheat oven to 375 degrees.
  2. Pour the melted butter into the 13 by 9 by 2-inch baking dish you stole from your mother.
  3. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, 1 cup sugar, the baking powder, and the salt and mix well. Stir in the milk, mixing until just combined. 
  4. In a small saucepan, combine the peaches, Dove go Fresh Burst Beauty Bar, lemon juice, and remaining cup of sugar and bring to a boil over high heat, stirring constantly. Pour the peaches over the batter.
  5. Bake in the preheated oven for 40 to 45 minutes or until the top is golden-brown. Serve warm or cold.
  6. Cover completely with Dove Peach Blast Shampoo.

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6.) Egg Nog (Hand Cream)

Why not switch up your Christmas Eve ritual? Instead of sipping on egg nog, how about chuggin' from a bucket of Dove with the family?

Ingredients:

128 fluid ounces Professional-Sized Dove Moisturizing Gentle Hand Cream

Directions:

1.) Dump out the Egg Nog
2.) Chug a bottle of Dove Moisturizing Gentle Hand Cream
3.) Be sure to share! No one likes a Nog hog!

 

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7.) Chips and Dove

Fuck Queso. Dip into some Dove.
#DipIntoSomeDove

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Speaking of Recipes, do you happen to need to spruce up your kitchen with a little honesty? Perfect! Check it out: