If we were to make a post about our opinion on gun control, would you click the link? If we got super vulgar and aggressive about either being totally for it, or totally against it, would you get interested enough to share it with your friends who either feel the same way or the exact opposite? We're desperate for traffic, and definitely need as many clicks as possible so that we can keep delivering you the posts you've always loved to read, and so that we maintain a healthy relationship with Dove Soap, our sponsor.
So tell us, if we posted some statistics we found in the first search result after typing "Why Guns Are Stupid" into google and then followed it up with a relevant and controversial hashtag like "#GunsRBad," would we get the incredible amount of clicks and traffic we deserve? Or would the click-bait value be higher if we posted a sweet-ass video of a ton of huge guns destroying stuff in slow-motion and then followed it up with an equally potentially viral hashtag like "GunsRCool"?
Just let us know so we can blow your fucking mind with our next amazing and controversial post about how guns are either terrible for everyone or badass as fuck.